a keyboard, a second-grade education, and a powerful sense of entitlement
The tentative date for Bham Blogger Meetup Part Deux is Thursday, January 22nd, and the tentative place is On Tap in Lakeview. If you're in the Birmingham area, or just want to fly in for the evening, come on down! Mark your calendars, I'll post more details as they become available.
My new dentist has a nice rack.
It really takes the trauma out of getting a filling. It's nothing sexual, it's just that having a set of bosoms hovering inches from your face while you lie flat on your back is at the same time calming and reassuring. It's like you're a little kid, back in mama's lap. And I'm not even a boob man. Don't misunderstand - I like them - I'm just not picky about them, I like all of them. But my quest is for the perfect booty, the awesome hiney, the brilliant backside. The most awesome hooters in the world can't stir me the way that a slightly above-average derriere does. And nothing can set my neurons misfiring like a nice, round, curvy bottom. It's been that way as long as I remember. If you don't understand it, I can't explain it to you. But you know what I mean. You've got a trigger too, and you know what sets it off. Share with the group, this is the big ole anonymous internet.
It really takes the trauma out of getting a filling. It's nothing sexual, it's just that having a set of bosoms hovering inches from your face while you lie flat on your back is at the same time calming and reassuring. It's like you're a little kid, back in mama's lap. And I'm not even a boob man. Don't misunderstand - I like them - I'm just not picky about them, I like all of them. But my quest is for the perfect booty, the awesome hiney, the brilliant backside. The most awesome hooters in the world can't stir me the way that a slightly above-average derriere does. And nothing can set my neurons misfiring like a nice, round, curvy bottom. It's been that way as long as I remember. If you don't understand it, I can't explain it to you. But you know what I mean. You've got a trigger too, and you know what sets it off. Share with the group, this is the big ole anonymous internet.
From the "Does Size Really Matter?" department:
Apparently the Indonesians who claimed to have the world's longest snake overestimated it's length by, oh, 28 feet or so. Naturally, they blamed it on shrinkage.
And speaking of shrinkage, Diversionz linked to some news video from Dallas that did wonders for my self esteem. This one isn't really safe for work, because you'll probably be laughing really hard, and someone might want to see what you're giggling about.
Apparently the Indonesians who claimed to have the world's longest snake overestimated it's length by, oh, 28 feet or so. Naturally, they blamed it on shrinkage.
And speaking of shrinkage, Diversionz linked to some news video from Dallas that did wonders for my self esteem. This one isn't really safe for work, because you'll probably be laughing really hard, and someone might want to see what you're giggling about.
As some of you already know, I did the Amazing Chicken Wing Diet back in the fall of 2002. It worked really well for me, but eventually I got bored with it and went back to my carb-scarfing ways. I've never considered myself much of a trendsetter, and I was pretty sure every one had done the low-carb thing already, but apparently they haven't. Not judging by all the new commercials I've seen since the holidays. Subway and Ruby Tuesday, among others, have jumped on the bandwagon. I guess it's New Year's resolution marketing.
I had lunch yesterday at the Ruby Tuesday in Columbia, Tennessee and noticed they had new low-carb menu items. Among the side dishes was "Creamy Mashed Cauliflower". I wasn't hungry enough to try it - if you have, let me know how it was. Another notable one was "BBQ Pork Crisps", aka pork skins or pork rinds. That's the beauty of the diet, deep fried pork fat is perfectly legal! Hunker down on a king-size bag of chicharrones, they have ZERO CARBS! The things I ate the most while I was doing the diet were buffalo wings, salad, that pre-cooked and seasoned sliced chicken breast in a bag, olives, cheese, pork skins, and fajitas. If you're trying to diet off all that Christmas candy, I salute you, and wish you good luck. All you skinny people *cough*sugarmama*cough* can kiss my big ole butt.
I had lunch yesterday at the Ruby Tuesday in Columbia, Tennessee and noticed they had new low-carb menu items. Among the side dishes was "Creamy Mashed Cauliflower". I wasn't hungry enough to try it - if you have, let me know how it was. Another notable one was "BBQ Pork Crisps", aka pork skins or pork rinds. That's the beauty of the diet, deep fried pork fat is perfectly legal! Hunker down on a king-size bag of chicharrones, they have ZERO CARBS! The things I ate the most while I was doing the diet were buffalo wings, salad, that pre-cooked and seasoned sliced chicken breast in a bag, olives, cheese, pork skins, and fajitas. If you're trying to diet off all that Christmas candy, I salute you, and wish you good luck. All you skinny people *cough*sugarmama*cough* can kiss my big ole butt.
I had a pretty cool New Year's - went up to Nashville for the Music City Bowl. They have a nice stadium up there, and Auburn won! War Damn Eagle! Rang in the New Year at the Gaylord Opryland hotel, drinking in Findlay's pub with the Wisconsin fans (and a few players). I found out that it's the largest hotel in the world without a casino, almost 2900 rooms and a pretty amazing place - the Christmas decorations were awesome. I'll start off this year the same way I began 2003, hoping for a year that sucks less than the last one.
Mac at War Liberal confirms what anyone who's been to a local Wal-Mart already knows, Alabama has lots of fat people. The flip side of that bad news is that we have lots and lots of good places to eat, and most of us have mamas who know how to cook. My mama's family got together Saturday at my parents' house, and a conservative estimate of the total calories laid out would be in the billions. There could have been more fried stuff, though. Just a suggestion.
America's favorite hoochie decides her ratings are slipping, marries....Jason Alexander? She married Costanza? Good news for bald guys! (got the pic here - thanks, Mookie!)
